Shotgun Rider

I have goody two shoes ingrained in my very being. I follow rules. I do what should be done every time. Oh, I have vices. I drink and I swear like a sailor and sometimes I don't wash my bra quite as often as I should. 

But really, I'm a rule follower. I follow the should not the want. 

And some days this just leaves me restless and anxious and unsettled. 

Today, for instance. I've been in my head too much this week. Overthinking everything. Literally everything. 

I'm a very rational thinker, so sometimes this is okay. But after a long hard week of just THINKING all the time, I've gotta get out of my own head. 

The best way for me to do this is to drive. No destination. Just a journey into the darkness. It has to be at night, dark. I can be alone or with someone, it doesn't matter. Loud music. Windows down. Not a worry in the world except for where I'm gonna turn around. 

Tonight I asked my closest friend if she wanted to drive. I need someone there tonight. She's sick and said she couldn't possibly leave her couch. I understand. Logically, I understand completely. But it makes me sad. 

I want a shotgun rider tonight. 

So instead, I'll probably do what I should and just drive myself home. No long, winding roads. No loud music or windows down. No forgetting my troubles and leaving it all behind.

I'll just go home.